Love and Relationships

I Fell in Love With My Neighbor, but After Babysitting His Kids I’m Full of Doubts

I’m 35, and 9 months ago I had a very messy and painful breakup with my fiancé, so I moved in with one of my friends and her husband in a house we are all now renting together. It was then that I met my neighbor, who I will call Kevin. He helped us all move our stuff into the new house, and I fell in love with him at first sight. We live in the suburbs of a big city, so we both ended up taking the same bus to work at the same time each day.

I knew Kevin had a wife and kids. I was aware of it from the very beginning, but it never stopped me. Kevin talked about them very often and even showed me the photos of them on his lockscreen and I saw some family pics of Kevin and his wife in their joint account on Facebook. I didn’t mind it at all, the whole relationship initially started out as a very innocent, silly crush.

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Kevin is a handsome and a funny and sweet guy. The first time we were together in the bus, he asked me about my job and life, and I saw he was genuinely interested in what I was saying. This is something my ex never did and is something we argued about a lot.

Kevin is always doing things for his kids, he brings them treats and other stuff, and he was staying on the phone with his small daughter the entire way to work because she needed a soothing talk before a school presentation. For me, it was easy to imagine how lovely and attentive Kevin would be with me because he was like that with everyone else.

I just knew that Kevin and I could easily become something more. I also found out shortly after I developed feelings for Kevin that his wife is a person I went to the same school with, and I was surprised because they are total opposites. He is funny, she is very dry, he is exciting, she is dull, he is not an intellectual person, but she is very smart. I just was sure that their personalities didn’t fit very well together at all, and I could easily see Kevin getting stuck in a relationship because he was just so nice.

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One evening, Kevin knocked on my door and asked if I could watch his kids for a few hours. I agreed right away. He told me that his wife was in the hospital in another city, Kevin was super worried and decided to drive there to see her. They don’t have any relatives, so he asked me to keep an eye on their kids for a few hours while a family friend would drive several hours to watch the kids at night.

Kevin’s kids were an absolute nightmare. They have three girls, and the oldest was a typical bratty preteen with a complicated character. She was rude, she disrespected my authority, she was arguing with me about everything. I even heard her call me names under her breath a couple times.
The middle girl was very loud and wanted to play loud, messy games even when I told her not to. The youngest girl, however, was sweet and quiet on her own, but she quickly joined in with the drama that her sisters wanted to create.

I finally agreed to play hide and seek with the younger girls and I ended up getting locked out of the house. When I went back and tried to convince the oldest girl to let me in through the back door, she pretended she didn’t hear me and just put her headphones on. Thankfully, Kevin’s family friend arrived a few minutes later and let me in, and then I went home.

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The incident with babysitting makes me really sad, because before that time I would often dream about being a stepmom to Kevin’s kids one day. Now I want nothing to do with these horrible kids, but at the same time, this is another proof to me that Kevin and his wife are not happy because children from a happy family do not behave like this.

I just want to have a relationship with Kevin now, but I do not know if it is possible because his kids and I would not get along at all. Their mother also could easily get them to hate me. I really love Kevin and I know that we could have a beautiful relationship. But the incident with his kids has really shaken me. I just wish I had someone to talk to about this, but everyone in my life would simply judge me.

Source: Brightside

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